By Lindsay Dreyer
Sep 29, 2016 @ 3:15 pm

Setting a table is truly an art—but it’s an art that anyone can master with a little bit of help. Enter Jung Lee, the incredibly talented founder of FÊTE, a full service wedding planning and design company in New York City. Lee stopped by the InStyle studios recently to walk me through some of the table setting basics. For example, how many glasses should you place out? How tall should your floral arrangements be? Should you use a round table or a rectangular one? These are just a few of the questions Lee answered for me during our table setting tutorial, which you can watch in the video above.

But before you even start thinking about selecting your flowers and placecards, Lee suggests putting some thought into what kind of bride you are. What is your vibe? What feels the most “you”? Don’t let others sway you in a direction that feels inauthentic or else you won’t be completely happy with the outcome of your table décor—or any other aspect of your wedding, for that matter.

“I hear all the time, ‘I don’t know if I should do black tie’... Listen, it’s your one day and if you’re someone who likes to get dressed up, you should definitely say black tie,” advises Lee. “At the end of the day you have to figure out what makes you you. A lot of times people will think, ‘Oh, I’m supposed to do this,’ and then they do, and that’s what makes it a cookie cutter wedding.”

Easier said than done, right? Lee says that even the most confident women sometimes have trouble determining their vibe or theme, and that can make selecting and arranging the table décor even more daunting. Don’t rush the process. Take some time to think about your wedding after the wedding, suggests Lee, and what you want people to think about 10, 20, even 30 years from now when they look back on that night.

“I’m all about deconstructing and building it back up,” she says. “What’s the feeling? What's the vibe? What are the things that really speak to me? Focus on the things that matter most to you."

And remember, you don’t have to do it alone. Not everyone is a DIY queen, and that’s where wedding planners and designers like Lee come in. When it comes to picking the right person or business to help you plan the wedding of your dreams, she has a few pointers.

“If the wedding planner talks about their own wedding, it’s probably not a great sign,” she laughs. “But look at the breadth of the work that they’ve done, call for references, and ask them questions." It's important to understand why they're making the choices they are so you're not suprised or unhappy with the outcome on the day of the wedding. 

But most of all, just try to enjoy the process. If you stay true to yourself from start to finish, you'll end up having the best, most Instagram-worthy night of your entire life.