Justin Bieber, why did you leave the apartment today?
The newly engaged pop star, 24, should have paid closer attention to his horoscope. You see, Bieber, born March 1, is a Pisces (a sensitive sign that is often very #misunderstood), and had he bothered to check what the stars had planned for this Tuesday, Aug. 7, he would have known that the day was destined to be a bust.
His horoscope reads: “If you are not in the mood for socializing today you must not force yourself. Let everyone know that you are happy where you are, even though there does not seem to be much in the way of human stimulation. Your mind stimulates you enough.”
Unfortunately for Bieber, there’s one thing giving him plenty of stimulation lately: Hailey Baldwin. Look, we cannot confirm whose idea it was, but one of them decided that Tuesday was indeed the ideal day to ride across New York City’s West Side Highway via CitiBike in 80+ degree weather — until it wasn’t.
While sleuthing nearby, a paparazzo caught them together taking a break from their ride, only to realize that the break was not a break at all but rather Bieber pausing to let his emotions rip, to show Baldwin that unlike most men, he’s a deeply sensitive Pisces that wears his heart on his sleeve and isn’t afraid to cry. Like really intensely. Like insanely intensely. Like the type of bad, intense cry you have after breaking up with your first middle school boyfriend.
Don’t believe us? Take a look for yourself.
He finally decided pull over on the side of the road and burst into a healthy, heavy, deep, stressful sobs. Basically, he was all like, “Is it too late now to say sorry,” and she was all like, “what do you mean?”
In all honesty, though, what did happen?
Did he cheat on her? Accidently slip up and slide into an ex’s DMs?
Was the day simply too hot to handle?
Did she once again force him to chop off the mustache?
Is he so deeply in love with Baldwin he can’t help but burst into random spurts of physically manifested emotion?
Maybe they broke up? If so, don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened, Bieber.
Our most educated guess? She didn’t let him borrow her super-cute Versace T-shirt, because she wanted to wear it today. We’d cry, too.
Look, we hope that Bieber and his family and his friends and Baldwin are doing fine. We really do! But these photos are bananas.
The real hero of this entire outing, truly, is Baldwin, 21, who by the way, is a Sagittarius, and from the sound of her Aug. 7 horoscope was not planning to deal with this drama right now.
Her horoscope reads: “Something that occurs out of the blue today may give you a bit of a fright but almost immediately you will recognize that it is precisely what you need to motivate you. You’ve been far too quiet of late Sag – time to make some noise!”
If “a bit of a fright” translates to, “what the hell did I get myself into?” than yep, horoscopes are pretty accurate.