She made it look easy.

By Christopher Luu
Updated Mar 04, 2020 @ 7:15 pm
Advertisement

Khloé Kardashian sat down with her older sister, Kourtney, and while her signature humor was on display, the two got deep when the younger sibling spoke about the trouble she had while she was breastfeeding her daughter, True. In a video for Kourtney's website, Poosh, Khloé got into how she felt jealous because every time she remembered seeing Kourtney breastfeed, it looked completely natural and effortless. It was the opposite of what she went through, but she notes that it was probably due to stress, not pain.

"Pain wasn't my problem," Khloé said. "I think parents go through pain for their kids, they don't care. It was more I wasn't producing milk. I was like,

'Whatever is the best for her.' But I understand, I was under a lot of stress, there was a lot going on in my life at the time that I think played a part in why I wasn't producing as easily. But I don't know. It was just a lot."

Vivien Killilea/Getty Images

Khloé went on to say that when she was just starting with True, now 22 months old, she felt alone and isolated in Cleveland, Ohio.

"Not having family there, you're also just trying to figure it out like I was — I'm still just trying to figure it out for myself, is this right?" she added.

She went on to explain that after consulting with a doctor, she decided to use formula, instead. She said that making that choice felt like such a relief and she could "enjoy" being with her daughter.

"Once I stopped, though, the amount of pressure that was lifted off my shoulders and I could enjoy my daughter," she said. "Seeing [her] consume 6 oz. at this time, 4 oz. at this time, it made me feel so good to know."

It wasn't instant gratification, however. She told Kourtney that there was a sense of guilt, too.

"I felt so … like I failed," Khloé said. "I felt so bad about myself."

"Not that you even did anything," Khloé said to Kourtney. "But you would just talk about this experience you had and how beautiful. 'I breastfed for 18 months,' and, 'What do you mean you're not producing milk?!' You would say things not at all trying to criticize me but I would take it like it's not that easy."

Kourtney clarified, saying that while it may have seemed easy, it wasn't. And, unlike Khloé, Kourtney said that she experienced a lot of pain when she breastfed.

"I remember the first month being the hardest you know to really … there is pain involved with the latching," she said. "Once I figured that out then it was pretty easy, easier for me, but there was pain."