If you haven’t been keeping up with the wives of the U.K.’s soccer stars (Victoria Beckham excluded), you’ve been missing out on a hotbed of drama.

TV personality and wife of footballer Wayne Rooney, Coleen Rooney, deserves her own detective series based on the sleuthing she’s done in the past five months. On Wednesday, Rooney shared a lengthy post regarding a social media investigation she conducted due to years of leaked information.

“For a few years now someone who I trusted to follow me on my personal Instagram account has been consistently informing the Sun newspaper of my private posts and stories. There has been so much information given to them about me, my friends and my family – all without my permission or knowledge,” she began.

Frustrated, and driven to follow a hunch, Rooney “blocked everyone from viewing my Instagram stories except one account.”

“Over the past five months I have posted a series of false stories to see if they made their way into the Sun newspaper,” she revealed. “And you know what, they did! The story about gender selection in Mexico, the story about returning to TV and then the latest story about basement flooding in my new house.”

“It’s been tough keeping it to myself and not making any comment at all, especially when the stories have been leaked, however I had to. Now I know from certain which account/individual it’s come from," she cotninued.

“I have saved and screenshotted all the original stories which clearly show just one person has viewed them.”

And then, for the final, beautiful cherry atop a riveting social media sundae, Rooney wrote, “It’s ………. Rebekah Vardy’s account.”

Rebekah, you see, is the wife of soccer player James Vardy.

Coleen Rooney Rebekah Vardy
Credit: Jean Catuffe/Getty Images

Naturally, Vardy denied all involvement, and expressed her anger toward Rooney for not only outing her, but doing so while she is “heavily pregnant.”

“Over the years various people have had access to my Insta and just this week I found I was following people I didn’t know and have never followed myself. I’m not being funny but I don’t need the money, what would I gain from selling stories on you? I liked you a lot Coleen and I’m so upset that you have chosen to do this, especially when I’m heavily pregnant. I’m disgusted that I’m even having to deny this,” she shared in a statement.

Regardless of whether Rooney has fairly implicated Vardy, Twitter users are enamored with the platform’s new amateur detective and have even coined a nickname for her: WAGatha Christie.

Looks like it’s ………. time for Reese Witherspoon to give this tale the Big Little Lies treatment.