Cannes Film Festival is underway and we’re itching to borrow an A-lister’s private plane and jet off to the South of France. Unfortunately, neither Beyoncé nor Jay Z has yet to offer us a seat, so we’ll have to make do with eating sub-par croissants on our Pottery Barn couch and perusing the Foreign Cinema category on Netflix.
But just because you can’t make it to the festival IRL, that doesn’t mean you can’t party like a YSL-clad starlet striking a record deal on the bow of a billion-dollar yacht. Rest assured, we have your festival experience covered—and it’s going to look and feel just as amazing as sipping a glass of rosé on the French Riviera (probably).
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Scroll down below for your ultimate guide to Cannes sans Cannes.
Grab a Posse
When in doubt, be like Blake.
Lively was a paparazzo’s dream when she walked Cannes’s red carpet in 2016 wearing a series of fairy tale dresses we can only describe as princess-worthy. But where would Blake be without her audience? This photo would look downright uncomfortable if we were to erase the hoards of paparazzi in the background. This conundrum touches on the age-old question: If a celebrity arrives at Cannes and no one’s there to see it, did it even really happen? Avoid these big-picture worries by having a loyal band of followers on hand to capture your every move. Don’t do anything unless there’s a camera within three feet!
BUY A RELIABLE CREPE PAN
This trusty non-stick pan boasts a 4.6/5 star rating, making it one of the most desirable crepe pans on the market (or at least on Amazon). You deserve nothing less. Now you just need to hire someone to make you crepes all day …
BUY A CHIC SWIMSUIT FOR MIDNIGHT DIPS ON THE FRENCH RIVIERA
Don’t let your guard down for a moment—the paparazzi are always watching. Look and feel your best on the beach (or in your bathtub) in a classic swimsuit that reminds everyone that you’re the Queen of Cannes.
INVEST IN RED CARPET-WORTHY FLATS
Remember when the festival decided to force women to wear heels? Well, you’re not going to stand for that (no pun intended). Protest the ludicrous dress code by hitting the red carpet in a pair of glamorous flats. BONUS: These particular sandals double as the ideal yacht party shoe.
Buy a Bottle of French Wine
No trip to Cannes is complete without taking a moment (or several) to appreciate France’s impressive wine selection. Whether sipping from a crystal champagne flute aboard David Geffen’s yacht or chugging from a red solo cup at your friend’s studio apartment, you’ll feel oh so sophisticated with a bottle of Veuve Cliquot at the ready. (So what if you ordered it online, it’s convenient!)
Binge Your Way Through the 21st Century’s Palme d’Or Winners
Last, and most importantly, you must dip a toe into the pool of foreign cinema. The most efficient way to do this is by streaming all available Palme d’Or award winners—the highest honor one can receive at Cannes.
Scroll down below to see which Palme d’Or Winners from the past ten years are available (for free!) through the major streaming services:
The Square (2017): Available to stream on Hulu
Dheepan (2015): Available to stream on Netflix.
Blue Is the Warmest Color (2013): Available to stream on Hulu.
4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days (2007): Available to stream on Hulu
Most other award-winning films are available to rent through Amazon or iTunes—see a full list of Palme d’Or winners here.
