The Most Hilarious Debate Recap You'll Read This Week

The Most Hilarious Debate Recap You'll Read This Week
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If you didn't make it until the end of the first presidential debate of the 2016 election (or if the jabs were flying back and forth quicker than you could keep up with), we've got you covered.

InStyle teamed up with our favorite source of fast news, theSkimm, to bring you a lightening-fast recap of the issues covered by Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump and, of course, the evening's best zings. The daily newsletter's knee-slapping roundup comes during their mega-successful #NoExcuses voter registration campaign that has registered over 60,000 new voters and counting, plus the debut of Skimm Studies, a research product that provides insight into what female millennials think (did you know that millennials account for about a third of voters?).

Read on for all the details of last night's debate from theSkimm's newsletter, The Daily Skimm—then get ready to hit the polls next month.

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THE STORY

Last night was the first big test of the 2016 race. Nobody won. Nobody lost. "I switched my vote," said pretty much no one.

WHAT HAPPENED?

The first presidential debate. Hofstra University hosted. GOP nominee Donald "Mr. Sniffles" Trump wore a big beautiful blue tie. Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton wore a red, yup, pantsuit. No idea what moderator Lester Holt was wearing because he was taking an off-camera nap.

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WHAT'D THEY TALK ABOUT?

Each other ... as in Hillz thinks Trump should say "sorry" to the thousands of workers he's stiffed over the years. And Trump thinks Clinton has had "30 years" in politics to make change ... and hasn't. Plus, he thinks he has a "much better temperament" than Clinton.

The Economy … as in Clinton wants to raise the minimum wage and mind the gender pay gap. Trump thinks the U.S. is losing jobs to China and Mexico. Lester asked him how we should get those jobs back. And Trump basically said "we're losing jobs to China and Mexico."

Trade … as in everyone Googled "TPP." Trump hit Hillz for initially supporting President Obama's new trade deal, which he thinks is a no good, very bad deal. She responded by saying "erroneous on both counts." And if you're confused, you can buy her book.

Tax returns ... as in Lester reminded Trump that he still hasn't released his. Trump says he'll get right on it ... as soon as the IRS finishes auditing him. Meanwhile, Clinton said Trump's tax plan would cost the U.S. millions of jobs. Trump said "au contraire," his tax plan would actually free up lots of cash money to create more jobs.

Racial tensions ... as in Trump wants to bring stop-and-frisk policies to high-crime cities like Chicago. Cue Lester turning off his mute button to point out that stop-and-frisk was ruled unconstitutional in N.Y.C. years ago. And then Hillz chipped in to say she wants to get police departments and black communities to do some trust falls.

President Obama's birth certificate ... as in Lester wanted to know why Donald couldn't let it go, let it gooooo until last week. Trump said actually, Clinton's campaign started the rumors back in '08 that Obama wasn't born in the U.S. Fact checkers say, "denied."

Cyber security … as in apparently Barron Trump is on the computer a lot. Clinton is still shocked, just shocked, that Trump called on Russia to hack her emails. Trump said "now wait," we don't know it was Russia. It could've been a 400-pound person sitting on their bed. So, there's that.

ISIS ... as in Trump thinks Clinton is showing her cards by telling ISIS how she'd fight them on her website. And Clinton said, "I've shown you my plan, now show me yours."

Manners ... as in The Donald does not appresh those attack ads the Clinton campaign's been running. Clinton said that Trump's criticized her for preparing for the debate, but you know what else she prepped for? Being president. Zing.

theSKIMM

Last night was a big chance for either Trump or Hillz to turn the tide in their favor. Trump came out with a bang and then lost his mojo. Clinton held back in the beginning, but ended with a full sprint. So yes, undecided voters are still saying "halp." Look for Round 2 next month.

 
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